Scrambled Egg and Chinese Haircuts

Scrambled egg and toast

I made scrambled egg for lunch yesterday and it went surprisingly well. Here’s my pro-guide(!) on what to do.

You will need:

  • 2 eggs per person
  • a dash of milk per person
  • a twist of salt and pepper per person
  • a small pot
  • a spoon
  • a gas ring
  • roughly 5 minutes of resisting the temptation to eat it all raw (ew)

Break the eggs into the pot (YOU DON’T EAT THE SHELLS!!!). Add the milk, salt and pepper and mix together with the spoon. Put on a low to medium heat. Stir the egg as it cooks. The egg will start to scramble and stick to the bottom of the pot – tone down the heat and scrape the egg off the bottom constantly from now on. When it’s almost fully cooked take it off the heat. Voila! You have just cooked scrambled egg!

I suggest that it goes very well with toast. Season it more if you like! As a bonus, you’ve also just presented whoever is doing the washing up with quite a tough challenge. Congratulations! 😀

(Note: Don’t get too eggcited when cracking the eggs. When I was doing this one of the eggs eggscaped from my grip and eggsploded on the floor. Make you you don’t follow this eggxtremely bad eggxample.)

If you can build this, you can cut hair

Having eaten your eggs, you’re now ready for a haircut – I got mine done this morning. There’s a nice place in Dun Laoghaire called Violet (if you’re a guy you probably shouldn’t tell any of your male friends the name!) that I go to whenever I need one done. It’s run by a bunch of Chinese people and they’re absolutely fantastic; whatever you might say about the Chinese, you can’t deny that they know how to cut hair! It’s 10 euro for a dry cut for a man and you never have to wait more than 5 minutes before they get to you.

The only problem with the place is that they don’t have great English. They ask you what you want done and you sit back and tell them you want a loop-de-loop over here, and a quantum bang over there, and sure why not go for a bit of string theory on top. They pause for a second, process all this information, then helpfully summarize it all in a simple, hopeful, one word question: “Razor?!?”

I never have the heart to refuse them. So, razor it is (With a bit of ‘scissor’ thrown in for good measure too of course). They cut your hair really fast; they know exactly what they’re doing. And, most importantly, at the end it looks great. I love the Chinese.

And there you have it: scrambled eggs and a Chinese haircut. The two essential ingredients of a perfect weekend 😉 Try it sometime – you won’t regret it!
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